Barack Obama and Mike Huckabee won the Democrat and Republican Iowa Caucases, respectively.
Hmmm….that’s nice.
Speaking of nice, I was so happy today because as I was out walking I saw a very pretty tree. I know that there are those amongst you who believe that all trees are pretty, but that just isn’t true. There are pretty trees, and there are ugly trees. It is just a fact of nature: deal with it.
Of course, trees shouldn’t be judged by how pretty they are; but rather by the oxygen they help produce, or the shade that they provide, or by the quality of paper they’ll eventually provide one day. I’d say that beauty is only skin-deep, but these are trees we’re discussing, and they don’t have skin. They have bark.
Speaking of bark; I’ve always wondered what kind of sounds a tree would make if they had the chance. I don’t think that they’d sound much like dogs, but then again, maybe they do…or maybe dogs sound like trees. Hmm….
What would you ask a tree? It can’t be a very stimulating conversation. It’s not like that you can ask them if they’ve gone anywhere lately; and you can’t talk to them about baseball, because who knows if one of the Bats used in a baseball game was once a friend of that tree. I would think that avoiding those kinds of touchy subjects would be for the best.
Speaking of tree-products…does anyone else feel guilty about using toothpicks sometimes? Do you think that is really the kind of thing a tree aspires to become someday? It would be really bad if they just made a single toothpick out of an entire tree and threw away the rest. Seems kind of wasteful to me. Should I feel bad for laughing at the thought?
Personally, I don’t use toothpicks anymore. Instead, I use these little DenTek Triple-Clean Floss Picks. They rock, and it’s not because using them helps to save trees, but rather it is because they have a taut line of floss on one end which makes getting between the molars easier. Of course, if by using these I save even one tree then it would be worth it.
Of course, if a tree had a chance it would probably kill me, you and everyone whom we love. They’d also kick dogs and step on kittens. Come to think of it, Trees can be real dicks sometimes, as can that preachy, little, furry bastard, the Lorax. Damn hypocrite probably has hardwood floors all throughout his Hollywood Mansion.
So yeah, Obama and Huckabee….whatever.
